议会上的美腿


意大利男人热情奔放,街上看到美女吹口哨赞两句,算不了什么。意大利男人娶太太,爱挑个『妈妈』型的,臀大乳巨,煮得一手好菜。娶回来供在家里,外头再搞几个女友情妇,生活多姿多彩。可是尽管纵情声色,家里的女人始终是供奉的女神。

电影《教父》有这么一幕,其中一个『马仔』玩女人玩出事了,教父语重心长的劝说:『回去吧,你太太在等你。』银幕上黑帮片的气氛顿时烟消云散,一股家庭的温馨萦绕着穿笔直黑西装的酷男们,衔在嘴里的一根烟一个回身化为口叼的红玫瑰,噢不,是康乃馨。

这就是意大利男人。撩拨女人是本性,即使女人不断的告诫自己:『都是坏男人!都是坏男人!』结果还是昏了嫁给他生儿育女,在厨房里煮着意大利面时,试图把他的风流一个叉子卷起,把醋意嚼在口里狠狠地咽下去。

意大利总理贝卢斯科尼(Silvio Berlusconi)是个意大利男人,不止具备了意大利男人的大情人特征,和太太拉里奥(Veronica Lario)『耍花枪』的花式更像一个外销的乳酪比萨饼,你一口我一口人人爱吃。

向来因口无遮拦而臭名昭著的贝兄,这回可惹怒长得酷似苏菲亚罗兰的夫人了。

他参加了18岁女模的生日派对,还买了一条镶上钻石的金项链送她。女模和总理亲昵得直称他『papi』,相等于中国人叫『干爹』。嗲了爹地怒了妈咪,贝夫人道:『哼,总理连自己女儿的18岁生日派对都没出席过。』

『我受够了。』她说。身为他芸芸众『女』中的一员,拉里奥容忍她枕边人的风流韵事这些年,终于忍无可忍,发飙了,『我要离婚!』

让我们数数看她容忍了什么:她原谅他与未成年少女调情;当一些人谴责他染上电话性服务的恶习时,她依然坚守在他身边;他委任半裸演出歌剧的女演员为平等事务部部长,她忍气吞声。虽然,拉里奥也是同等出身,歌女心声谁人知。当贝兄看到台上动人的玛拉(Mara Carfagna)时,公开地说:『要是我还没结婚,我定会立刻娶她。』贝夫人听了怒气冲冲的登报要求贝兄道歉。

贝兄是意大利男人,道歉小事一桩。道了歉再委任美女入阁,有什么难的。

这对夫妇红过脸,吵过架,登过报,道过歉。贝兄闯过一关又一关,不止没因顾及身份而收敛,反而变本加厉。贝兄说过:『我在议会上看到无数的美腿…我爱我夫人,可是我没法子不注意到她们。』

看来这回甜言蜜语不管用了,还等什么?拉里奥终于决定『拉上他俩婚姻的帘幕』,床上的美腿一脚把总理踢下床。

(本文刊登于8/5/2009《东方日报》龙门阵

评论

匿名说…
Kenyan man sues over sex boycott

Posted 5 hours 33 minutes ago

A Kenyan man is seeking damages for anguish sustained during a week-long sex ban called by women's groups in a bid to force political leaders to put their rivalry aside to work for the common good.

James Kimondo is suing the leaders of G10, a coalition of women's groups that called for a national boycott to push the men into resolving the east African country's political woes.

"Since the women called for the sex boycott, my wife has denied me my conjugal rights. This has caused me anxiety and sleepless night," Mr Kimondo said.

"I have been suffering mental anguish, stress, backaches, lack of concentration," he told reporters outside the Nairobi High Court, where he lodged his petition for damages.

The group even urged prostitutes to join the strike.

The strike ended on Wednesday with the organisers claiming it had been a success.

They argued that the country's egocentric male leaders should not have time for matters of the flesh when the country is ensnared in economic and political trouble.

President Mwai Kibaki and his rival Raila Odinga were pressured into a power-sharing deal by international mediators following violence which accompanied December 2007 polls, but lingering tensions have crippled the coalition government and fuelled widespread discontent.

The two, who have hardly met recently, held brief talks on Monday and held a cabinet meeting on Thursday, the first in a month.

Mr Odinga accused Mr Kibaki of stealing the presidential election, prompting protests that spiralled into a cycle of tribal violence and killed around 1,500 people.

- AFP
杨艾琳说…
这样的『武器』很新鲜,若见效本国不妨借用,反正宪法没办法的,新『武器』或许是办法,呵呵。
Grace Lim说…
意大利‘风流’总理并不代表全意大利男人,可是意大利男人的确是最热情浪漫,生活品味超高,马车夫们在街边午间休息时,听歌剧,拿出他们各自带的午餐篮子,红酒,三文治,水果,酒杯,餐具齐全,桌布摊在马车座上,很悠闲的享受他们的午餐,对路人点头,微笑。。。 意大利人很懂得生活!
杨艾琳说…
好讨厌,搞到人家很想去意大利了。就算在外国遇见意大利人都受不了他们的热情,能随意表达感情的民族难怪有高艺术造诣啊。

有没有人乐捐机票一张?
Grace Lim说…
哈哈!寄一张马车夫在街边用午餐的照片给你看!

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